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Blue Barfoone - Garden Night Creature

Blue Barfoone - Garden Night Creature

.....doesn't actually exist which makes it difficult to explain why you can usually see one every Wednesday night, at 2.39am, tirelessly weeding your garden. Barfoones are oversensitive and self conscious creatures and should be approached with extreme caution. If startled or frightened in any way they will emit a barrage of terrifying attack balloons form their enormous mouths. If you ever see a balloon in the night sky you know that there is a panicking Blue Barfoone not too far away. You have been warned.

Pink Draboone - Garden Night Creature

Pink Draboone - Garden Night Creature

Outrageously self important but ultimately pointless garden night creature. A year in the life of a Draboone lasts for a mere 24 hours which means it celebrates its Birthday every day. This makes them very expensive and annoying pets. Look out of your window at 3.47am and you might just see a Draboone pleading for a present. They eat cake and egg mayonnaise sandwiches on white sliced bread. This one is 11042 today which makes him about 33 but you should probably check that on the calculator. 

Yellow Guaroone

Yellow Guaroone

The awful tuneless singing and ham-fisted guitar playing make the Guaroone one of the most unwelcome of garden night creatures. On the plus side they leave no mess and, unlike some, take all their specialist picnicking and barbecuing equipment with them in the morning. Although easily domesticated and assimilated into family life, at over 9ft tall, 23 stone and prone to telling the same story over and over and over again, they can test even the most patient Guaroone fancier if acquired as a pet. Proceed with caution. 

Brown Bufoone - Garden Night Creature

Brown Bufoone - Garden Night Creature

A bizarre mix of brown bear, red deer, bad dress sense and poor dental hygiene mean the Bufoone has to try harder to make friends that the average garden creature. Well-read, cultured, fluent in 245 languages and an excellent stand up comedian, the Bufoone is easy to know and a likeable companion. There is no end to his talents, which can become tiresome but his excellent baking skills mean his constant showing off can be overlooked if you like cake. Don't, under any circumstances, tie a green balloon and a blue balloon to his left antler as this  is the Bufoone equivalent of an engagement ring and breaking it off will be upsetting. You don't want to end up married to a Bufoone, trust me. 

Red Peliboone

Red Peliboone

Don't be fooled by the ballet shoes. Peliboones dislike dancing, classical music and all forms of theatre. They would rather play board games and cards whilst eating chocolate covered peanuts. The shoes are actually used to enable stealthy hunting as the Peliboone likes to sneak up on its dinner unannounced. Someone should tell them that choccy nut snacks can't hear them anyway. Since 1905 they have been banned from flying but will occasionally take to the skies on a Wednesday in March if it's raining. No one knows why but if you catch one you could ask them for me.

Night Creatures

This is a new range of cards for children

Night Creatures

Each of the 6 (and there will be more) has its own personality and talent - the first one is Orange Tangeroone (although he is a bit more red) and he is...The life and soul of any suburban late night garden party. Or so he thinks. The Tangaroone is the friend you'r not really sure you want to be friends with. Don't be filled by the yellow party hat - its actually part of his head. They attend so many parties and events that Mother Nature decided it would be better for the environment just to make them that way. Turn your music off by 9pm to avoid an army of these creatures gate crashing your garden in search of fun - and snacks. Lots of snacks!

I was born in Oxford and now live in South London with my husband and three children. I worked for many years as a fashion stylist, and even when I was doing that all I really wanted to do was draw.....

Comments

PManCat

PManCat

01. August, 2014 |

We're getting a cocker spaniel tomorrow that we are going to call Jarvis :-)

Antony Medley

Antony Medley

17. January, 2012 |

I'll grow one if you get rid of yours first.

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